I've just been doing a bit of weeding and pruning in the garden and noticed that my 'Glory of the Snow' bulbs are already showing signs of sprouting. I don't know how I feel about this; pleased because I'll be able to enjoy a bit of colour in the garden come December, or sad because it marks the onset of the beginning of autumn.

DIRECTIVE

Please note:

As of October 1st.
The Imperial unit
Of measurement, the worm
Will be replaced by
Its metric equivalents,
The millipede and centipede.

Thank you.

One of the main problems I personally have with modern capitalism is that there is too much consumer choice, much of it superfluous.

I suppose one advantage about being unemployed and on a limited income is that I don't need to participate in this pointless ritual. I merely purchase the least expensive food (frequently out of date) and shop for clothing in charity shops.

Naturally, I'm immune to the effects of advertising, aren't I?

AMERICANS

Herts. van hire
Gogh away!

Sidewalking crabs
On the john.

Downtown,
Janet buys
Burghers to go.