I've just returned from the Post Office where I went to pay my electricity bill. As usual, it was an estimated bill, but for once it was pretty accurate and so I didn't bother to phone in the actual meter reading.

MEN

At the interview
For the post
Of Head Gardener
He temporarily
Forgot the Latin
Word for 'spade'.

PICKLE

It's raining:
It appears
My parasol
Is getting
Wet again.

I'm a bit of a news junkie..there are three, 24 hour news channels on the Freeview terrestrial TV service which I have access to; and I watch them a lot. Naturally, I also monitor many of the international news sites on the web.

I also enjoy watching sport and have been keenly following the cricket, some days hardly missing a ball.

Yesterday however, for most of the day, on all three channels there was nothing but blanket coverage of the post-Ashes celebrations. This coverage lasted for hours and so it was fortunate that nothing of importance was happening anywhere else in the world, wasn't it?

CHECKLIST

In the event of fire:-
i) Approach the stone circle from the south
ii) Touch each of the stones in turn, walking
in a clockwise direction
(N.B. All stones are automatically touched
with right hand.)
iii)Always enter the circle from the south
iv) Always depart the circle towards the north.

All staff and visitors are to gather in The Harvest in an orderly manner.

PLEASE NOTE: The Fire Brigade will never arrive.