I've just finished eating some pork sausages, which, according to the list of ingredients on the label, contain just 32% pork.

I'm now wondering just how little meat sausages can actually contain and still be legally described as pork sausages, and do the same regulations apply to beef sausages as well?

Dogs sings ringtones

A Chinese woman claims her pet dog can 'sing' along with mobile phone ringtones.

Mrs Zhang, of Xi'an, capital of Shaanxi province, says 14-month-old Dangdang picked up the habit a year ago.

"I was in the kitchen and my mobile phone rang in the sitting room. Then I heard Dangdang making a series of strange sounds, which was exactly in the rhythm of the music.

"He stopped when I picked up the phone," she told Xi'an Evening Papers.

From then on, whenever her mobile phone rang, Dangdang has 'sung' along with the music.

"The difference between high and low tunes is quite obvious, and the speed is also in good control. From his expression he seems to enjoy the singing," added Mrs Zhang.

She says Dangdang is a very intelligent dog who escorts guests downstairs when they leave and barks farewell.

And she added: "He knows how to play dead. If you point at him with hand shaped like a gun, he'll immediately fall to the ground and stay still for half an hour."

I've just bought two more packets of seeds; Californian Poppies single mixed, and stocks ten week mixed. Together with the cottage garden annuals and butterfly annuals I purchased earlier, I'm going to spend the next hour or so planting them in seed trays indoors.

Outside, the daffodils are only about a week away from blooming and the bluebells won't be far behind.

A woman in the bar says that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts. Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery."

The lady asks, "How do I do it without surgery?"

"Just rub toilet paper between them."

Startled the lady asks, "How does that make them bigger?"

"I don't know, but it worked for your ass."