Minimalist poet, minimalist lifestyle

A 43-year-old German man was taken to hospital in critical condition after he fell off a second storey balcony during a spitting contest with his 12-year-old son, police said Friday.

A spokesman for the police in the eastern town of Cottbus said the man in Forst had apparently lost his balance after thrusting too far forward in his attempt to outspit his son.

He tumbled over the ledge and landed on a balcony of the ground floor apartment, police said. He was taken to hospital in a rescue helicopter.

Slang guide for Tesco's silver army

Older supermarket workers are being given a guide to youth slang to help them understand younger colleagues and customers.

The pamphlet is being tried out in some of Tesco's 1,500 stores with a high proportion of employees over retirement age.

Key phrases in the guide include:

Bad: Good (but this can also mean bad. When in doubt, just nod).

How’s it hanging’?: How are you today?

Laters: Cheerio, goodbye.

Minging: Ugly, unattractive.

Phat: Wicked (in the good sense), cool.

Slammin’: Pleasing to the eye.

Talk to the hand: I’m not listening.

Wack: Weak, boring.

A Tesco spokesman said: “It aims to help bridge the generation gap and offer a guide for older members of staff looking to chat with younger colleagues and customers."

Lionel Gardner, 70, who works at Tesco Extra in Eastbourne, East Sussex, said: "It's a great idea. I love working with young people but a lot of the time I have difficulty understanding what they are trying to say.”

And Ash Coley, 18, who works in the same store, said: “We youngsters learn a lot from the old timers. It is very interesting to talk to them - especially when they go on about the war.

“Hopefully, we will be able to have even better conversations with them now with the help of this guide.”

Tesco PR chief Jon Church, who recruited daughters Nicola, 15, Gemma, 14, and 11-year-old Hannah, to help write the guide, said: “We have a very diverse workforce and customer base and in today’s fast-moving world there can be a communication barrier between generations.

“If the leaflet is well received, we will roll it out to all UK stores.”

Dwarf mechanic mistaken for 'abducted' boy

German police staged a major operation to find a kidnapped child after a woman spotted a "young boy" being locked into a car boot.

The panicked woman alerted authorities as the car drove off, and police set up road blocks and dispatched patrol cars to intercept the vehicle.

But when the car was finally sighted and stopped, police found the "boy" was actually dwarf car mechanic Klaus "Shorty" Mueller, 27.

He had climbed in the boot and asked to be driven around so he could see where a strange rattling noise had been coming from.

Police in the northern city of Bremen confirmed a woman had called after she looked out her apartment window and saw a child in the boot - just before the driver slammed it shut and drove off.

The spokesman added: "A major investigation and manhunt was immediately launched and the car and its driver were apprehended. It seems the driver had been worried by inexplicable rattling noises in or near his boot. He called a mechanic, who was very small, and who climbed in the boot to get to the bottom of the problem."

Police said the mini mechanic had often used the same method to solve the problem and had found it the best way to detect the source of strange noises.