Posts archive for: 13 October, 2007
  • Three very important commas

    1. THE FATAL COMMA
    Czarina Maria Fyodorovna once saved the life of a man by transposing a single comma in a warrant signed by her husband, Alexander III, which exiled a criminal to imprisonment and death in Siberia. On the bottom of the warrant the czar had written: `Pardon impossible, to be sent to Siberia.' The czarina changed the punctuation so that her husband's instructions read: `Pardon, impossible to be sent to Siberia.' The man was set free.

    2. THE BLASPHEMOUS COMMA
    In several editions of the King James Bible, Luke 23:32 is changed entirely by the absence of a comma. In the passage that describes the other men crucified with Christ, the erroneous editions read: `And there were also two other malefactors.' Instead of counting Christ as a malefactor, the passage should read: `And there were also two other, malefactors.'

    3. THE MILLION-DOLLAR COMMA
    The US government lost at least a million dollars through the slip of a comma. In the tariff act passed on June 6, 1872, a list of duty-free items included: `Fruit plants, tropical and semitropical'. A government clerk accidentally altered the line to read: `Fruit, plants tropical and semitropical'. Importers successfully contended that the passage, as written, exempted all tropical and semitropical plants from duty fees. This cost the US a fortune until May 9, 1874, when the passage was amended to plug the hole.

  • Will there be enough room?

    Spacewoman takes whip into orbit

    A female astronaut set to take charge of the International Space Station has been given a whip to keep her crew in line.

    Peggy Whitson was presented with a "kamcha" - a traditional Kazakh riding whip - a day before she is due to blast off.

    A Russian official at the Baikonur cosmodrome in Kazakhstan, Sergei Semchenko, said the gift was to help her keep her male crew in line.

    The 47-year-old biochemist will be the first woman to command the ISS. It will be her second trip there.

    Ms Whitson laughingly accepted the whip saying she hoped she would not have to use it but would take it just in case.

    She is scheduled to take off from Baikonur on Wednesday with Russian Yuri Malenchenko and Malaysia's first astronaut, Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor.

  • A very expensive doughnut

    FARMINGTON, MO. — Shoplifters at Country Mart tend to favor cold medicines and packaged meats. They used to steal cigarettes, too, until tobacco was moved behind the counter. But the doughnuts were never a target for thieves.

    Country Mart's doughnuts — fried fresh daily in the store — sell for just 52 cents each. That is why the "shoplifters will be prosecuted" signs are displayed in aisle 4 with the pricey pain and allergy pills, and not in aisle 5 beside the glass doughnut case with its tiger tails, jelly-filleds and eclairs.

    Then one man's sweet tooth got the better of him. He stole a doughnut. A single doughnut.

    Authorities called it strong-arm robbery. The "doughnut man," as the suspect is now known, faces five to 15 years in prison for his crime. And Farmington, a town of 14,000 people about 70 miles south of St. Louis, has been buzzing about it ever since. Advertisement

    "That someone would take just a single doughnut, not something very expensive or extravagant, that's unique," supermarket assistant manager Gary Komar said, smiling.

    Scott A. Masters, 41, is accused of shoplifting the pastry and pushing a store worker who tried to stop him. The worker was unhurt. But with that shove, his shoplifting turned into a strong-arm robbery. Masters, who appeared in court Friday, is stunned. The prosecutor shows no signs of backing down. In fact, because Masters has a prior record, he could get a sentence of 30 years to life.

    Lanell Gibbs was there the day of the doughnut heist.

    "That was a first," Gibbs, 68, said.

    She has worked for 11 years as a cashier at Country Mart, a regional supermarket chain. Next to her register, she keeps a clipping from the local newspaper about the doughnut man's case. He was indicted just last month, although the theft took place in December. She likes to show the article to customers as she recounts the story.

    It was about 11 a.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 6. The store was in a lull. Gibbs, who could see the doughnut case from her station, said she saw Masters slip the doughnut into the pocket of his hooded sweatshirt.

    She turned to a co-worker and said, "I saw him take a doughnut. Let's see if he pays for it."

    They watched Masters as he strolled past the seven green checkout lanes and out a side door between the customer service desk and the pharmacy, passing under a giant "Country Mart Thanks You" sign.

    Gibbs' co-worker followed Masters into the parking lot. The co-worker, a 54-year-old woman, demanded that Masters come inside, according to the police report. He offered to give the doughnut back. She declined and grabbed his arm.

    That is when Masters allegedly delivered "a backhanded punch to the chest" and took off running, police said.

    "That made her mad," Gibbs recalled.

    The woman, who was uninjured, jumped in her car and called police as she chased Masters. He was arrested minutes later.

    Farmington Police Chief Rick Baker said the two incidents taken separately equaled two misdemeanors: shoplifting and minor third-degree assault. Together, they make for second-degree robbery, a class B felony, defined in state law as forcibly stealing property. The amount of force and the amount of property does not matter.

    "It's not the doughnut," Baker said. "It's the assault."

    Masters is a small man, wiry, about 5-foot-6, with short-cropped hair, a graying goatee and hound-dog eyes. He is a "frequent flier" at the St. Francois County detention center.

    "Yeah, Scotty is well known," said Deputy Sheriff Dennis Smith, reviewing Masters' criminal history.

    Masters, who lives in the nearby town of Park Hills, has been arrested more than a dozen times: for being drunk, for shoplifting, for missed court dates, for marijuana possession. He spent most of the 1990s and a stretch from 2000 to 2004 in state prison for the felonies of torching a car to collect insurance and possessing methamphetamine ingredients.

    In a jailhouse interview last week, Masters admitted he had taken the doughnut. Masters said he had been taking a break from his roofing job when he stopped into Country Mart. He was hungry. He fled the scene, but he said he did not lay a hand on the woman.

    "Strong-arm robbery? Over a doughnut? That's impossible," Masters said, exasperated. "I've never had a violent crime in my life. And there's no way I would've pushed a woman over a doughnut."

    After his arrest, he forgot all about the case. He assumed it had been dismissed. He spent the summer in jail on outstanding warrants. Just before he was to get out, he was indicted Sept. 14 in the doughnut case. His bail was set at $25,000 — well beyond his means.

    Masters briefly appeared in court Friday. His case was continued until next month. He is shaken by the possibility of a third felony conviction. A prosecutor could pursue an enhanced sentence. As a persistent offender, Masters could face a murderer's term.

    "I can't believe this crap," Masters said.

    A grand jury agreed with police on the strong-arm robbery charge. County Prosecutor Wendy Wexler Horn said that it was "way too early to know how it is going to play out" but that the charge seemed appropriate given the allegations. She was aware that some people seemed shocked by the case.

    "People are missing the point," Horn said. "It is not about the doughnut."

    But to many people here, it is all about the doughnut.

    Still, for all the attention paid to the doughnut incident, one detail may never emerge: the kind of doughnut Masters stole.

    Country Mart stocks everything from simple glazed ring doughnuts to gooey butter squares to filled cream horns and danishes. But the police report makes no mention of the doughnut style. Gibbs said she could not recall it. Other workers, too, drew a blank.

    Even Masters, sitting in jail with only time to think, said he could not remember. It is a detail that seems lost to history.

    And Masters never got a chance to enjoy that fateful doughnut.

    He said he threw it to the ground when he fled.

  • Something to look forward to

    A friend has just phoned me to say that he will probably be able to get me some regular sessions leading a poetry workshop in a community centre in one of the local villages.

    The good news is that I'll actually be getting paid....I don't know any details yet though.

  • Wife or mistress?

    A doctor, a lawyer, and a manager were discussing the relative merits of having a wife or a mistress.

    The lawyer says, “For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce, it causes all sorts of legal problems.”

    The doctor says, “It's better to have a wife because the sense of security lowers your stress and is good for your health.”

    The manager says, “You're both wrong. It's best to have both so that when the wife thinks you're with the mistress, and the mistress thinks you're with your wife - you can go to the office and do some work.”

  • Blair-faced cheek

    Tony Blair's new neighbours could be up in arms - over proposals to give him his own double yellow lines.

    The former PM has already faced complaints from his neighbours over security, a planned roof terrace and solar panels.

    But now, a letter to residents of Connaught Square in west London, asks for their views on proposals to ban parking along a nine-metre stretch of road for anyone except Mr Blair.

    It means two residents' parking bays outside Mr Blair's house would be set aside for his exclusive use 24 hours a day.

    Parking bays on the opposite side of the road will also be converted to "Blair only" spaces, reports the Daily Telegraph.

    Martin Low, the director of transportation for Westminster council, acknowledges in his letter that "concerns" about temporary parking arrangements have been expressed by Mr Blair's neighbours.

    Many residents are known to be disgruntled at being unable to park near their homes when the square is full, having lost several bays to Mr Blair and his bodyguards.

    The scheme would be paid for by the Home Office. Residents have until the end of the month to object.

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