Minimalist poet, minimalist lifestyle

A mechanical engineer, a systems engineer, and a software engineer are in a car driving down a steep mountain road when the brakes fail. The driver desperately pumps the brake pedal, trying to control the speeding vehicle around cliff-edge bends, while the passengers do their best not to panic. As the car hurtles towards an impossible corner the driver spots an escape route into a hedge and a haystack beyond, where the car eventually grinds to a surprisingly safe stop. The three engineers all get out, shaken, relieved, and take turns to assess the situation.
'Hmm,' says the mechanical engineer, 'It looks like a brake line was leaking - let's repair the split, bleed the brakes, and we should be able to get on our way..."
The systems engineer thinks for a while and says, 'Maybe we need to contact the manufacturer and the dealer to confirm exactly what the problem is..."
The software engineer slowly climbs into the driver's seat and, gesturing for the others to join him, says, 'How about we get back on the road and see if it happens again?..'

A butcher, who had had a particularly good day, proudly flipped his last chicken on a scale and weighed it. "That will be £6.35," he told the customer.
"That's a good price, but it really is a little too small," said the woman. "Don't you have anything larger?"
Hesitating, but thinking fast, the clerk returned the chicken to the refrigerator, paused a moment, then took it out again.
"This one," he said faintly, " will be £6.65."
The woman paused for a moment, then made her decision...
"I know what," she said, "I'll take both of them!"

From The Times:

It must have seemed such a simple wheeze to Gordon Brown: a motto to capture what makes Britain great. The idea ticks so many boxes on the Prime Minister’s to-do list that it proved irresistible to him.
A motto would be new, but could convey tradition. Choosing it means consulting people, the kind of participatory democracy that rebuilds trust in politics. And then there is the unstated post-devolution awkwardness of having a Scot as Prime Minister. The motto can highlight Britishness, what unites rather than what divides us. How clever! How British!
However, before the wording of Mr Brown’s motto has even been agreed, let alone embossed on letterheads and passports, the public seems to have rumbled him.

My favourite suggested by Times readers, by a long way is:

Dipso, fatso, bingo, asbo, Tesco.