Minimalist poet, minimalist lifestyle

Jake is five and learning to read. He points at a picture in a zoo book and says, "Look Mama! It's a frickin' elephant!"
Deep breath... "What did you call it?"
"It's a frickin' Elephant, Mama! It says so on the picture!"
...and so it does...
' A f r i c a n Elephant '

A Finnish library-goer apparently thought 'better late than never' and quietly returned a book on loan for more than 100 years to a library in Vantaa, in southern Finland.
The library had long since lost track of the loan but welcomed back to its collections the bound copy of a 1902 volume of Vartija, an active religious monthly periodical at the time.
"We are unclear when exactly it was borrowed and who returned it. There weren't any documents with it," librarian Minna Saastamoinen told Reuters.
"There is an old note attached to the book which says there is a fine of 10 pennies a week for late returns," she added.
The library sticker inside the cover, and the old-fashioned handwriting on it, showed the book was last officially loaned out at the beginning of the last century, she said.
Finland is known for a comprehensive library network with more than 900 libraries for its 5.3 million inhabitants. In 2006, each Finn on average visited a library 11 times and borrowed nearly 20 books.
The periodical was borrowed such a long time ago that the Korso branch of the Vantaa library, where the tome was finally handed in, did not even exist when the book was borrowed.

A dog is truly a man's best friend.
If you don't believe it, just try this experiment.
Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of your car for an hour.
When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?

A comment on a news forum [I've forgotten which one] to the question, 'Who will win the next general election?'

'I'm hoping for a hung parliament…the whole bloody lot of them!'