John O'Reilly won the pub's prize for best toast of the night with: "Here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife!"
O'Reilly went home to tell his wife Mary - only changing the toast to: "Here's to spending the rest of me life sitting in church beside me wife."
"Oh, very nice indeed." said Mary.
Next day Mary ran into one of the last night's pub denizens on the street corner.
"Aye, and John won the pub prize with his toast about you, Mary." he said with a leer.
"Indeed!" said Mary. "He told me. And I was a bit surprised myself. He's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep and the last time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."
