Minimalist poet, minimalist lifestyle

"Congratulations my boy!" said the groom's uncle.

"I'm sure you'll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your
life."

"But I'm not getting married until tomorrow." Protested his nephew.

"I know," replied the uncle.

A typical example of the behaviour and attitudes of the metropolitan elite.

Cabbie gets wrong Stamford Bridge

A cabbie taking Earl Spencer's daughter to a Chelsea match ended up in Yorkshire after a sat nav blunder.
Princess Diana's niece and a pal wanted a cab 85 miles from Althorp, Northants, to Stamford Bridge in London.
But the sat nav sent the driver 146 miles away to the village of Stamford Bridge, East Yorks, reports The Sun.
Paul Achiampong, owner of Northampton-based Mayfair Taxis, was due to meet the Earl, 43, to apologise.
He said: "We do 20,000 journeys a month and mistakes can happen. But I admit this is a big one. I'm still trying to figure out how that was possible."
A spokeswoman for Althorp estate, where Diana is buried, said the matter would be sorted amicably.
She would not say which of the Earl's three teenage daughters was involved. She missed Chelsea's 2-1 victory over Arsenal on Easter Sunday.

It's raining - but it's forecast to be a lot heavier later.

I was walking by a ex-catalogue discount shop and noticed a hand-written sign in the window which read 'Wetter Station £3.99'. How appropriate this morning! Of course, it should have read 'weather station £3.99.'

A few minutes later I popped into a shop and was undercharged by 22p.

I've just read that the Odeon Cinema in town has closed; no more cheap Tuesday afternoon visits with my brother then.

At least the building won't be demolished; it's a grade II listed building - a quite interesting Art Deco cinema built in 1934, I think. [There's a horrible 1970's façade that will need removing by the new owners though]